I once heard that, in order to breakthrough in life, aside graces from God, I need to do things I’ve always feared. I did hear this and similar phrase on different platforms but I never gave it attention.
Growing up as a young girl, I desired to do some things but any time I attempted, I heard voices in my heard, telling me that I was not good enough. I have lived to fight voices that discourage me from exceeding my limits and I am still fighting.
If challenges, battles and mistakes were living beings, I will thank them for the exposure. They are a reason for me today, the woman I am becoming.
One day, I wrote down all my fears and decided to attack them one at a time. Funnily, rejection has been one of my greatest fears. When I had the opportunity to partake in Face of Faith Pageant Africa, I had a lot of thoughts running through my head. This time around, it wasn’t about not being good enough but “what ifs”. What if I’m evicted? What if I don’t pass through audition? What if people laugh at me when I’m evicted? The fear got stronger and stronger. As a result of this, I delayed in applying and I said a prayer, Lord, let your will be done with respect to this pageant.
I later applied and I passed through audition and qualified. Just being part of the audition has built me in a way. In the audition room, I felt so tensed and made a grammatical error I wouldn’t make on a normal day. That was when I realized how dangerous fear can be. I lost my self , due to fear. The me, was out of me. There was another me that I didn’t know of.
When I stepped out, I was broken hearted, asking myself how I messed up in the auditioning room. It was a battle with myself. I later realized how important it is to try your fears. I identified potholes with myself and quickly had to work on myself from there. I may not win or even go far as far as the pageant is concerned but I am grateful for the exposure. I believe that it is a platform for me to better myself for greater things ahead.
It will interest you to know that one of my fears is driving, swimming and facing a large crowd. I know it will get better because it always gets better.
You can only break limits by fighting your fears, apart from God!